Hello, my friends, from the quarantined trenches of casa dolce casa! It has been quite some time since I posted to this blog, aka emotional outlet. So much for the new year's resolutions, eh?
I have been putting in my 20 hours per week of work from home. It has been working out well, since I have my own dedicated office and a dog who loves to sleep by my feet except during ZOOM meetings. As soon as she hears other voices, she must be on my lap, greeting my co-workers and laying claim to me, her Mom, with lots of wet kisses. What can possibly be better than this?
While it is working out well, I have to admit I am tired. Work is a luxury that is keeping my mind active (well that along with reading, my crosswords and other word games). MHN has not been up for our cut throat Scrabble games as of late, nor are we inclined to turn on the television to watch & play Jeopardy. It seems our lives are becoming more singular...perhaps because of his illness and my exhaustion. Perhaps because we are under the same roof 24 x 7? Things get stale?
He started a new chemo therapy 3 weeks ago today. His pain levels are now manageable; his appetite is mostly back and he is moving around at times without a cane or walker. These are all good signs that the drugs are keeping the cancer at bay.
As a result, I am in the kitchen a lot to make sure he has plenty of food to eat. If you think this is easy, guess again. We are dealing with a lactose intolerant vegetarian Jew. There are a few regular dishes...eggplant risotto, spaghetti squash pomodoro, my homemade pizzas, kasha, zucchini & potato latkes, various pasta dishes and salmon. If you know me, you know I DO NOT tolerate any seafood. I hate it. So Star Fishmarket in Guilford will deliver 4 or 5 pounds of salmon, which MHN has to cook up, divvy into containers and eats when he wants. I am so sensitive to the smell of seafood, I have to hide out on another level so I don't gag. (Don't tell me if it's fresh it doesn't smell...it DOES!!!) Anyway, all of the above and lots of muffins. No mixes...all homemade: pumpkin spice, banana nut, strawberry, banana-strawberry and of course blueberry. Always on the lookout for new ideas....
For one who tends to be more introverted, this pandemic can almost be considered a gift. (I have heard other like-minded people also mention this.) I am not about a lot of human interactions. I like one on one interactions, or maybe a small group, less than 5 or 6 people. After that, it becomes a smile plastered on my face and wondering when I can get the f*** back to my own home. I have used this time to think about how I want to spend that last years of my life. I don't mean to make this sound depressing, but at 68, maybe if I am lucky & blessed, I might have 20 more years left. I pray they will be healthy years so I can finish out in 20 years what I should have been doing in 68 years. Ha! If I'm tired now, what will it be like later? A post for another day.
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